Monthly Archives: December 2008

I can has a puppy


Ramblin’ On

Take notice of the bounty of goodies that is displayed in the office breakroom. If you look closely, you’ll see that this table of deliciousness is different, save for the popcorn tin, from what I posted last week.
It’s hard to ignore; the break room is where the water cooler is and I go in there multiple times a day to fill up my water cup.

I have a co-worker who, in the past year or so, has lost a lot of weight, something like 50 pounds. I asked her how she passes up the goodies everyday and she said that she has a picture of herself up in her office at her heaviest weight and that picture helps her see the big picture. She suggested that I do something similar. So I took a picture of a pair of jeans. They’re about 3 or 4 years old which is kind of evident by their lack of style. In any event, these jeans used to be super comfortable. Now, I can barely zip them up. My thighs resemble sausages in them. So my goal, with all of that weight watchers shit and working out and all is to fit into these jeans again. And then throw them away. I am not allowed to get rid of them until they fit. Weird logic, I guess but it’s easy to just dismiss an item of clothes as something to give to good will because it’s old rather than because it’s too small.

So the picture of the jeans is taped to my monitor.

According to B, my co-worker, every time I am tempted by the holiday food, I should look at my jeans picture and think about the bigger picture. Which is going to make me happier in the long run? Wearing the jeans comfortably or eating a piece of chocolate?

So that’s the idea, but sometimes it just doesn’t work that way. Like after I ate my healthy lunch today, I WANTED SOME CHOCOLATE. I literally told myself that I needed to get some more water (even though my cup wasn’t empty) and tippietoed around the chocolate and I just couldn’t help myself. I weighed my choices and I went for it. A piece of Harry & David’s chocolate. (The gold wrapped candies on the table) And you know what? It was delicious. And you know what else? One piece of chocolate isn’t going to derail my weight loss. That one piece satisfied me and now I am not sitting in my office, trying to find excuses to go into the break room again. My water cup is definitely full right now.

I just typed the paragraph above and thought about it. Do I really feel that way? It’s hard, I have so many conflicting thoughts about the whole thing. I read a lot of blogs where the author’s have employed the whole moderation is key theory and have lost weight. Then I see people like my co-worker, who doesn’t seem to ever indulge and she’s lost a lot of weight. In my mind, I do everything right. I eat well, I work out, I indulge infrequently. But because none of this seems to be working, I start thinking that what I think of as infrequent indulgences might really be too much. I mean, something is not working. I just can’t put my finger on what. I don’t want to think it was the one Harry & David’s Chocolate (which was maybe 2 points) but I don’t know what else to think.

Okay, soooo rambly. Sorry.

I wrote that stuff earlier today. Sometimes when I’m sort of bored at work, I think I get too into my head. I start thinking too much which inevitably leads to worrying. Fortunately, the rest of my day got better.

I dont’ know how much I’ve written about this, probably not that much, but Jason and I have been trying to adopt a dog for a while now. We met a new one today and I think he might be the one. Here is me trying to get him to smile for the camera, although it looks like I’m choking him!
We visited with the dog for about an hour. The way that the organization works is you meet the dog (which in itself can be harder said than done; there sometimes are waitlists) then you decide if you like him, then the foster of the dog decides if they like YOU and if all goes well, you get the dog. The foster seemed to like us, so I guess we’ll know tomorrow if we get him!

After our doggie visit, we went to Fontainesfor dinner. They have $5 oyster specials on Tuesdays. I’m not a fan, but Jason likes them a lot.
I normally get mussels but decided on something different. I had the snow crab legs.
They were pretty good but NOTHING can compare to Maryland Blue Crab. I’m so spoiled from growing up there.

I also had a light beer and a few fries. And some popcorn and a weight watchers ice cream. Oops.

HBBC – 2

Once again, I got nothing

I did cook.

And spin.

HBBC – 4

Again with the tummy aches

My stomach hurts again! I don’t know why; I didn’t partake in any of the usual suspects – diet coke, splenda, alcohol. It’s frustrating the way I feel sick all the time. I shouldn’t say sick. It’s not debilitating, but it’s not fun either. I’m pretty sure it’s IBS. I’ve had issues with my stomach for as long as I can remember. I really have never brought it up to the doctor because it’s just always been there and it sort of never occurred to me that maybe I can do something to prevent it. When I say my stomach hurts, I don’t exactly mean it hurts. It’s more of a very uncomfortable gassy and bloated feeling and basically, I feel like I need to go to the bathroom. It also seems to intensify when I’m stressed out.

Aside from the stomach woes, today was a better day. I did not feel well at all yesterday right up until I went to sleep. I ended up sleeping for almost 10 hours and finally felt better when I woke up. I managed to have a somewhat productive day, quite a change from yesterday’s slothfullness (is that a word?). I did some laundry, took the recycling to Whole Foods, went to the gym and…well, that’s it. Oh, I also made some No Pudge Brownies. Not sure if that counts towards my productivity but we’ll say it does for shits and giggles!

Gym sucked. I hadn’t been since Wednesday which is sort of rare for me. I did 1.25 miles on the treadmill, 10 minutes on the stepmill and 20 minutes on the Arc Trainer. I really sweated up a storm. I felt like the toxins from the alcohol on Friday night were pouring out of my body. I don’t know if that really happens that way, but it felt like it.

HBBC – 3.25


It’s now after 10 pm and I still feel sick from last night. Today was a total waste. I spent the entire afternoon on the couch cursing myself for drinking so much last night. Needless to say, the gym did not happen. I finally managed to get showered around 4:30. It was my friend Maya’s birthday and she and her husband and another couple friends of ours Erin and Baha and I all went out to dinner at Tamarind Seed. The table got a bottle of Riesling. I stuck with water. The thought of having a glass of wine was enough to make my stomach turn even more than it already was. The food was delicious. I had the Pla-La-Prik. It was tasty but I wished it came with more vegetables. My friend Erin had the sea scallops and that was definitely what I’d get the next time. I also had a bite of a coconut cake. Really just a bite. I am all about coconut these days for some reason.

I was kind of bummed that I felt so bad. My friends have a 7 month old so they don’t get out much and we don’t see each other as much as I’d like. They had a babysitter for the night and actually were going go to a bar after dinner. As much as I would have loved to join them, I just couldn’t do it. I felt that crappy.

This is, quite possibly, one of the worst hangovers that I’ve ever had. It has robbed me of my Saturday completely. Sucks but tomorrow is another day and hopefully by then I’ll finally feel better.

Oh Bother!

I gave myself a break from the gym last night. I was tired and my body was sore and I think I’d gone at least 5-6 days in a row. The stipulation, however, was that I’d go early this morning. I have my company Christmas party this afternoon and it’s a friend’s birthday weekend so I know there is going to be more eating/drinking than usual. I set my alarm for 6 am and went to sleep fairly early. I somehow woke up on my own at 6:50 am and realized that I’d set the alarm for PM! This is the second time this week that I’ve had some sort of alarm malady. The other day I forgot to turn it on and now I set it incorrectly. Fortunately, my body is pretty good at waking up around the same time each day. Sucks on the weekends but a good skill to have when I can’t seem to set my alarm.

I’m trying to come up with a strategy for this holiday party. We’re having it at the same restaurant that we had it at last year, so I am a little familiar with the food. Last year it was a set menu and I believe that I had some sort of fish, so I’m hoping that they’ll have a fish option again. I also sort of vaguely remember there being large pieces of cake served. I cannot remember if they were worth it. That’s going to be my new strategy with desserts. Sweets are so abundant this time of year, especially in an office environment. I figured that some are worth it and some not. I just need to make informed choices. The chocolate covered strawberry that I had the other day – worth it! The random handfuls of caramel corn that I’ve been having all week – not worth it.

To Gym or Not to Gym

I went to the gym at lunchtime. I’m trying to get in the habit of doing 2-adays but sometimes it’s really hard to find that motivation. I don’t have enough time to do everything I want in the morning (well, I guess I would if I got up earlier, but it’s hard enough to get up at 6 and get my ass to the gym), I definitely don’t have enough time at lunch and at night, although I do have ample time, I feel like being at the gym all night is such a waste. It’s like work, eat, gym, sleep and that’s it. So I am trying, when I can, to go once at lunch and do weights and then again at night to do cardio. But here it is 8:15 and my motivation is seriously waning.

As for the lunchtime workout, here is what I did. Eh, never mind, I don’t know the names of some. But for all intensive purposes, I did some different machines, some squat jumps, wall squats, lunges with weights, calf raises and some glute exercises. I definitely broke a sweat in the half hour that I was there.

Woo hoo, I just saved that as a draft and went to the gym. I made myself a deal that if I went, I could just do the elliptical instead of running. I did it for 30 minutes and felt much better. It’s always hard to get out the door, after that, the workout is easy.

My eating has been…well shit today. Okay, not that bad, but not great either. I think I started out the day badly. I was not feeling oatmeal so I had a yogurt with mixed nuts which did not fill me up at all. I ended up eating a snack at 10 am. Usually, my breakfast will hold me until lunch. I went into the breakroom/kitchen to assemble my lunch and look what I saw:
Umm, yeah, holy temptation, Batman! It’s still two weeks before Christmas, this is just going to get worse and worse. Most of the stuff I can pass by without a second glance, but not Chocolate Covered Strawberries. The stupid thing was, I tried. I really wanted one but instead, decided to have a bit of popcorn to see if that would satisfy my craving. Umm, no. I sat in my office for half an hour thinking about those strawberries until I gave in and had one. I did, for the record, take the smallest one.

Somehow, by this point, I had eaten almost all of my daily points. I think by the time I got home and made dinner, I had 3 or 4 left. I do have a lot of activity points that I can use. 19, I think before they reset on Thursday. Anyone who does Weight Watchers, do you typically use all your weekly and activity points? They just reformulated the way the points work and now, instead of swapping your activity points when you go over your daily allotment, they swap them at the end, after you’ve gone over your weekly extra points. (Ignore that if you have no clue what I’m talking about!) It kind of scares me to use all my activity and weekly points. I know that they are there to be used and the diet is formulated as such that you can use them and still lose weight, but it still scares me.

Anyway, I digress. For dinner, I made a lazy girl’s French Onion soup. Back in the day, I used to love French Onion soup. Until I stopped eating beef and realized that it was almost always made with beef broth. Fortunately, Trader Joe’s has an onion soup that’s vegetarian. I cooked about a cup and a half of that and put a half piece of bread in the bowl and melted…don’t laugh…two string cheeses on top. It wasn’t half bad.
The only problem with this soup is that I could still taste it’s flavor in my mouth like 3 hours later. I mean, it was good and all but I really don’t want to burp it up all night.

HBBC- 4 points

Manic Monday

And it so it begins. The Holiday Booty Buster Challenge of course. I don’t think I’m going to win this thing, but it’s still a fun challenge. I’ll try to track my HBBC points at the end of my posts for the next month.

I have been fighting the urge to weigh myself. I know that for peace of mind, I need to wait until Thursday, my official weigh-in day. The number on the scale shouldn’t dictate my mood for the day, but unfortunately, it does. I think I’m doing well. I’ve noticed a difference in how I eat now that I’ve been tracking my food for two weeks. I used to have a lot of little snacks. I’d be bored at work and have a snack. I’d get home from work and immediately get a small snack. I was basically always eating and not listening to my hunger cues at all. Now, since I’m alloted a certain amount of food a day, I have to ask myself if I’m really hungry or just eating out of habit. Hopefully the scale will go in the right direction this week. Eventually it has to, right?

I went to spin class after work. I had a somewhat annoying day and needed to get some aggression out. The class was hard today. I’ve taken this teacher’s class a bunch of times and although it’s always tough, today seemed particularly so. Although it was super-hard, the hour passed fast and I felt better. It’s weird how exercise does that; it somehow changes your mood for the better. I got home and didn’t feel like making anything for dinner so I just threw together some random stuff. I made a spaghetti squash and topped it with spinach, mushrooms, tuna, tomato sauce and some cheese. It was okay. I should have drained the squash better; it was really watery. Maybe I’m not destined to be a chef. Food seems to taste way better when I follow a recipe.
I swear, all my meals look the same no matter what they are!

HBBC Points – 4 (spinning for an hour)

Where did the weekend go?

I didn’t really do much of anything this weekend and it’s still over in a flash. Oh well.

I got really worried today about job security. I think I’m okay but hearing about all the layoffs and how the economy is going to get worse before it gets better just makes me worry. I work in print advertising. Not the best place to be when company’s are trying to tighten their budgets. I know that there is no point in worrying about it; if it happens, it happens and I’ll deal but I just can’t seem to shake it. I got laid off of my last job back in 06. They eventually got rid of the entire marketing department but I was the first to go. That was in an okay economy. Ever since, I’ve been pretty scared that it could happen again. Fortunately, I’m kind of my own department at work. But unfortunately, if advertising keeps going down, the “department” might not be needed. I know I can’t keep myself up at night worrying about this but I just wanted to get it off my chest.

Aside from being a worrywart, I had a semi-productive day. Got some groceries at Trader Joe’s, went to a Pliates class at the gym with my friend Emily, did some laundry and made dinner. I was pleasantly surprised at how good my dinner was. I basically sauteed broccoli, water chestnuts, green pepper, garlic and shrimp in a little bit of oil and then some broth. I made a sauce out of no-chicken broth, soy sauce, szechuan sauce and some corn starch to thicken it. It seriously tasted just like something you would get in a chinese restaurant. I think the sauce could have used a tad more soy sauce but all in all, a success and super easy to make.

Necessity is the Mother of Invention

I had two portabello mushroom caps that needed to be eaten in the fridge. I looked up some recipes for stuffed mushrooms and came up with my own little version. I put various seasoning on the mushrooms and stuck them in the oven for about 15 minutes. On the stovetop, I combined 1/4 cup marinara sauce, a can of crab meat and 1 oz of goat cheese. I heated it up and put it on the mushroom. I know it looks gross but it was pretty good; a little too crabby, but good nonetheless.

With it I had a sweet potato and a salad.

I was having a lazy day earlier but finally managed to get my butt up off the couch and go to the gym. I did 45 minutes on the arc trainer to try to loosen up my legs. I did a pretty intensive leg workout on Thursday and am super sore today. On my way home, I needed to stop by CVS to pick up a few things. There was this guy outside and he went into this whole sob story about how he needed a ride to Sam’s Club. He was like, “I’m not dangerous, you can look in my backpack.” First of all, what woman in her right mind is going to give some random guy a ride? He should have known that. Secondly, Sam’s Club isn’t more than a mile or two away, he could have walked and thirdly, at the same time, a man was walking in and the “stranded” guy didn’t ask him for a ride. It just sort of sketched me out. I walked back to my car very quickly on the way out.

My Saturday night isn’t very happening. I sort of feel like I have nothing to do. I’m not bored yet, but I could very well be in a few hours. Jason will be home by then anyway. If I wanted, I guess I could make some phone calls, but I don’t know if I’m up for going out. I kind of want to go to Trader Joe’s. I have a killer sweet tooth right now.