A little background

After maintaining a 30-35 pound weight loss for several years, somehow I managed to gain the Freshman 15. Except I was a Freshman nearly 15 years ago! (Wait, was I? Ugh, I’m old.) I’m not exactly sure what happened. I guess I need to go into some background history.

I lost a lot of weight by doing the South Beach Diet. I’m not exactly sure how strictly I followed it or what I was really eating but my attempts to lose more and more weight started becoming more and more disordered. This was perhaps in 2005 and I don’t remember exactly what I was doing except that I had extreme willpower in most cases. I shied far, far away from refined carbs, worked out for an hour and a half a day and thought of up every excuse in the book not to go to bars. I got small. But along with smaller clothes, I had a bunch of unwelcome side effects namely bad breath, thinning hair and lack of a period. After a while, I recognized that I was flirting with a serious problem and managed to overcome it. I gained about 5-7 pounds and felt like I was at a happy weight for myself. I ran races and still managed to eat relatively well but didn’t kill myself trying to stay away from the breadbasket.

Fast forward about two years.

Still at the same weight, give or take. I decided to sign up for a marathon. Marathon training was tough and it made me hungry. Really hungry. So I ate. And ate. And drank. At the time I was seeing this guy who drank A LOT. Although we only dated for about two months, pretty much every date centered around alcohol. At the time, I thought I was having fun. I also thought that since I was running so much, my body would be okay. And it was. For a while. It was hard to listen to my body while I was training. I was honestly hungry all the time. I decided not to weigh myself because I wanted to give my body the fuel that it needed. During the training period, I probably gained 3 pounds or so. My clothes fit okay. After the marathon, I grew completely disenchanted with running. People say that running a marathon is one of the most rewarding things you can do for yourself. I didnt ‘feel like that. I was pissed off. Pissed off that I had to walk the last five miles because of heat exhaustion and dehydration. Pissed at my time. Pissed at running.

I still worked out, but I didn’t run. I did the elliptical a lot and lifted some weights. I also did Pilates here and there. And probably ate the same amount as I used to. It was sort of like whatever toll I had taken on my body, especially with all the drinking, was catching up to me. I felt sluggish and tired all the time. I went to therapy. I was really unhappy with myself at this time.

About a month or two later, I met Jason. We started hanging out a lot and a good portion of our first dates were also centered around alcohol. We’re both shy. At least for me, drinking helped me come out of my shell and get to know him better. I think the trouble with my weight really started when I started taking the pill. Probably a month or so after I was on it, my clothes became very tight. This was also around the holidays and my office got a ton of crappy, albeit tasty food. People say that weight gain from birth control is a myth. I don’t know. I used to gain weight in my stomach. My stomach has stayed the same. My pants are just all very tight in the thighs now. I think that is hormonal.

So, for the past month, I’ve been really trying to shed this extra ten or so pounds. I signed up for a half marathon. I’m not drinking during the week except on special occasions. Jason’s trying too. He’s lost 20 or so pounds. I’ve lost and gained the same 3.

I know how to do this. I know a lot about healthy eating. I just need to practice what I preach. I need to log my food to see how much I’m honestly eating. My problem isn’t so much eating unhealthfully, rather it’s eating too much healthy food. Even though a food is good for you, eating three servings of it is not. I’m also trying to lift heavier weights and document that too. I’ve been lifting light weights for a good 6-7 years and in some areas have not increased the weight at all!

So, there you have it, non-existent reader.


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