Honestly, I thought I was better. I thought that I wasn’t depressed anymore. But not being on the medicine has just made me feel like I used to feel. Like I felt when I decided to go on it. So, herein lies the question, do I learn to cope with it or do I go back to letting a little pill do the coping for me?
Besides that, I honestly need to do something about this weight gain. I know I’m not technically overweight so I think it’s hard for some people to understand. But I don’t feel comfortable right now. I don’t feel comfortable in my clothes and really, I don’t feel comfortable in my skin. I tried on some jeans that were my favorite pair about two years ago. I could barely button them. I just don’t know how to get this under control. I always complain that I work out and I eat relatively well and don’t get results but I think that I forget to factor in alcohol. Sometimes I wonder if I do have a problem with it. I’m not an alcoholic but I have trouble stopping once I start. I can go all week and not have a drink, that’s easy for me, but if I have one, next thing you know, I’m having five. I’ve struggled with this for a long time, since college I guess. I think that Caitlin asked her readers about their drinking habits a few days ago. Most people said that they used to drink a lot in college but have cut down. I haven’t. And I guess not many of my friends have either. I don’t know why it hasn’t tapered off. I used to smoke a lot of pot in college and after I graduated, I just lost interest in it and stopped. I don’t know why I haven’t lost interest in getting drunk. I think about this a lot. People tell me that they don’t think my drinking habits are a problem, but honestly, I sort of do. I just don’t know how to change them, really. I have to learn moderation. I have issues with it in many areas of my life. Food obviously being another one.
That was probably a rambling, non-sensical post, but I feel better getting it off my chest. I know that a few people read this, please comment!
PS – I just discovered Twitter. Add me – Djtippietoes.